We know corporations. If you don't, please see the movie, The Corporation. Click on the link to watch it online, or download it. Another movie we talk about below, is the movie The Informant, it's a must-see.

We know ourselves. We are Americans. We have a lot of pride, not enough guilt, and a lot of hope. We, the majority, stepped into the voting booth and chose hope.

Imagine the majority we'd be if we all got someone off his/her ass and into the voting booth.

When you hear craziness, ask, "Are you still drinking fluoride?"

Offer to buy a few gallons of spring water.

Do you remember hearing, This is the most important election in our history?

Every election is the most important. Miss one, and the bastards win.

Period.

While the people are scrambling to get out the vote, corporations are spending billions keep them home. How often we hear, "They're all the same. All crooks." They should know, they got them into office.

No matter HOW little a vote counts, it makes a difference, especially if it's not cast. Millions never cast that vote, and to conservatives, who don't want everyone to show up, this is how it should be. Money can buy a lot of conservatives when we don't show up.

Take pride in your progressiveness. We care. We even care about the fluoride drinkers who show up at town hall meetings screaming nonsense. We want them to have health care too.

What would Jesus do?

Cholesterol is a fat. To clean fat off plates, requires hot water.

Well, since we cannot safely raise our body's temperature to remove cholesterol caked on our arteries, we can lower the temperature at which cholesterol melts.

This is where Lecithin comes in. Cholesterol contains lecithin, but just not enough. When more lecithin is present, cholesterol becomes soluble.

We know that the higher your so-called good cholesterol you have, the better off you are. One reason for this is that this "good" cholesterol contains more lecithin than the so-called bad.

Adding a bit of lecithin to your diet is cheap. You can add it to your salad dressing, or you can supplement.

NOW Lecithin Triple Strength, 200 Softgels

Take three softgels per day.

Did you know that the first draft of the Declaration of Independence was written on paper made from hemp?

Did you know there is a great difference between industrial hemp and marijuana?

I wrote this article originally (we've updated it) for our first edition of the Wellness Directory of Minnesota™. It stands today on its own.

H L Menken once wrote: Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

Perhaps Americans will grow up one day and invest once again in this versitle plant.

Hemp for Victory

Go to Original:  Stevia.

If the new TV commercials for Truvia and PureVia are any indication, stevia has made a sudden and astonishing leapfrog from hippie sprinkle to bonafide challenger to the decades-long dominance of the blue (Equal), pink (Sweet and Low), and yellow (Splenda) packets on the tables of diners and coffee shops everywhere. Is its use in mainstream soda brands far behind? Hard to say, but one thing is pretty clear: the days of chemical-derived sweeteners are waning as consumers become more suspicious of foodstuffs which, as the food writer Michael Pollan says, can't be imagined growing in nature.

Stevia has been used by natives of South and Central America for centuries, and has long been highly-regarded for its intense sweetness, 30 times as sweet as sugar. It similarity to sugar is legendary: as Time magazine says of its key component, rebaudioside A, it has a "profile very similar to sugar with respect to onset, intensity and duration of sweetness."

Hold up though: wasn't there a problem with stevia? The sweet leaves of the ordinary-looking plant have long been banned for food use in the USA and European Union -- and in Singapore and Hong Kong -- due to concerns over a 1985 study that suggested steviol, a breakdown product from stevioside and rebaudioside, is a mutagen in the presence of a liver extract of pre-treated rats. In other words, it could create changes in the DNA of the liver, up to and including cancer. The study, however, was widely criticized by scientists who claimed the study was conducted in a way that would also find distilled water mutagenic, and largely discarded by health food aficionados, who continued to buy stevia powder in stores where it was marketed as a "dietary supplement" thanks to a ban by the U.S. FDA.

Stevia Makes Sweet Waves

The Food and Drug administration has cleared the use of a natural, zero-calorie sweetener for beverages that's derived from an herb called stevia. The move paves the way for a flurry of new products featuring the sweetener, called rebaudioside A. The stevia shrub, shown above, is native to Paraguay.

Stevia was until very recently considered questionable by the FDA, but in December 2008 an FDA advisory prompted by Cargill's development of Truvia held that stevia with 95 percent or 97 percent rebaudioside A is safe and products containing that substance can be called foodstuffs (and not, as one soda company previously described its products, a "carbonated stevia supplement"). Truvia and PureVia are both formulated with reb A, leaving out the components of stevia leaf that provide a licorice-flavored aftertaste. It should be noted that powdered stevia is still not considered safe as a food additive; the FDA hasn't explained this distinction.

So, about that stevia-sweetened soda: there are already a few versions out there. One all-natural variety from Seattle is called Zevia (which I've tried and liked, in smallish quantities). Long-time craft soda maker Reed's, Inc. is marketing stevia-sweetened versions of its Virgil's colas, root beers, and cream sodas. But the big change is set to come from PepsiCo (PEP), who along with Whole Earth Sweetener Company (a subsidiary of the company that markets Equal) developed PureVia -- they've said a stevia-sweetened Sprite is on its way -- and Coca-Cola Company (KO), who has already announced a version of Odwalla sweetened with Truvia. No, I don't know why a 100 percent fruit juice needs additional sweetener, either, but I'm sure the marketers will explain it to us in due time. Given the funding behind these two new sweeteners, it seems inevitable that Nutrasweet and Sweet and Low will soon be but the cultural memory of our parents.

Truvia's television commercials and the additives branding veritably bleed the "from nature" story (a leaf dots the "i," if the green colors didn't already convince you), even though the substance is certainly highly processed and does contain other ingredients such as erythritol (a sugar alcohol derived from fruit also eagerly advertising its "natural"-ness). Many long-time proponents of stevia complain that the FDA banned the substance for decades, until food giant and deep-pocketed lobbyists Cargill, Pepsi and Coca-cola sought to use it. And health pundit Mark Sisson points us to the extremely short nature of the only study on Truvia done so far -- it was 16 weeks -- as rather too small to prove anything. Real dangers could take decades to become obvious.

Sisson goes on to make a few important points about Truvia (and, by association, PureVia): first, "it isn't 100% clear that rebiana is entirely the physiologically-acting equal of other forms of stevia used throughout the world." The way an extractive works on the body could be very different than the way the whole substance does -- take white sugar, a highly-processed substance that wreaks far more havoc on the human body than sugar cane in its whole form. Further, it's easier to overdose on a chemically-derived substance than it is on the herbal source. I agree with Sisson's second point heartily: "as it is with any artificial/altered sweetener: ask yourself if the sweetened food/drink offers any real benefit (physical or otherwise) that you couldn't get from the same or similar food/drink that's unsweetened."

Drinking four cans of Sprite a day, whether it's sweetened with pure cane sugar, high fructose corn syrup, Nutrasweet, PureVia, or some as-yet-to-be-marketed substance, is probably not entirely healthy. Truvia seems to be a positive step in the direction of whole foods: but it's a very, very small step and should not be considered a giddy slip-and-slide toward "healthy" soda. Is it terrible for you? Probably not. Is it going to improve your health? Almost certainly not. As always, moderation is the way to go.

Whether soda companies will market it this way, given the evidence so far, is unlikely.

One of the things we get the most letters about is Anvirzel, a drug made from the Nerium Oleander plant.

The news on Anvirzel is bad. It passed first stage testing, but ran out of money (anyone out there with a spare billion to complete the testing?).

Then we heard of a form from Africa, our good friend, Marc Swanepoel, ND had made up Sutherlandia OPC and tested it with great success on AIDS.

The recipe for recreating Oleander Soup is posted, but some feel it's difficult to make, hard to find the plants, and they're terrified at making a mistake since the oleander plant is quite poisonous. That's ... understandable.

Well, we've finally found a company that is making an oleander extract, with approximately the same strength as the original soup recipe we got from Dr Ozel in Turkey. It's cheaper than chemotherapy. Much cheaper. It's a great immune stimulant. It is probably a great preventive, too.

This has been tested for toxicity, but keep in mind that this herbal formula can produce side effects. It is, unlike many herbals, to be used according to the instructions on the label. (Many herbal products have no known toxicity level.)

So here is the warning: No reports of toxicity have been received from clinicians supervising patients experiencing Oleander Extract Therapy. Supplementation as suggested with this herb seldom if ever exhibits any adverse side effects.

Possible side effects from this herbal mix when used as a dietary supplement may be slight nausea and vomiting, diarrhea, pruritus, pain at a tumour site, tachycardia and arrhythmias. Because of its blood-thinning properties, people on medical blood-thinning preparations should consult their doctors before using OPC. People on heart-active drugs, such as digoxin (Lanoxin®) or anti-arrhythmics should also speak to their doctors before using the mixture. No other drug interactions have been reported. Pregnant women should preferably not use the mixture due to its anti-angiogenesis effect. Other short term detoxification symptoms like a slight rash, runny nose, pimples, slightly painful joints, etc, may be experienced.

Utopia Naturals Rose Laurel OPC Plus.

Dosage:

As a supplement to stimulate the immune system, just one a day.

For those with cancer, depending on the aggressiveness, people are taking 3 to 5 capsules twice daily.

You MUST be supervised by a health care professional if taking these stronger doses, especially if you are taking other prescriptions. Some people just cannot tolerate large doses. Never go it alone.

We've had two success stories sent to us and stored in our email for some time. Both women have outlived their doctors' prognoses.

They are Nancy and Terri: Success Stories.

We had this demonstration sent to us from a reader, and we've posted the photos on a separate page to help this newsletter open faster.

See the demo here: Sugar Demo

You might also want to read an article we published years ago that has been copied by a good number of web sites: Cancer Loves Sugar.

We received a link to a video (The effect of animal fats on the human body) that has gone viral. In this video, a physician makes a presentation intended to scare everyone. He even shows an autopsy in which a thrombus (blood clot) is removed from an artery. The thrombus is not just your ordinary blood clot, but is composed of a fatty looking substance. He claims that this thrombus was caused by eating saturated fats and that it is filled with saturated fats.

This is why we feel that physicians should be forced to study nutrition and orthomolecular biology. Fact: Neither thrombi nor artery walls contain any saturated fats.

Here is what Dr Uffe Ravnskov, author of The Cholesterol Myths (and one of our advisors) said about the video (besides, "It's all crap!"), and the thrombus extracted from the artery:

It is an organized thrombus, the remains of a vulnerable plaque that has emptied its content into the coronary artery. Thrombi or artery walls contain absolutely no saturated fat; this is pure nonsense like everything else this guy is telling. There may be a lot of cholesterol inside the thrombus, but that doesn't mean that the cause is high cholesterol or a high intake of cholesterol.

Further Reading:

No evidence that saturated fat causes heart disease (it’s official)

The Skinny on Fats   

Why Butter is Better

The 20 Health Benefits of Real Butter

This last article refers to a piece of email going around that says that margarine is one molecule away from plastic. This is not only wrong, it's not scientific. Something can look chemically similar to another, but they are two totally different substances.

Following the article on Saturated Fats, I thought it would be a perfect time to introduce this article from Dr Sears' newsletter, after which we have an interesting article from the opposite.

 Three Big Reasons Why You Don’t Want to be a Vegetarian

Go to Original: Bottom Line Secrets

A large-scale study examining the effects of meat consumption on mortality has confirmed what myriad smaller ones have suggested -- frequently eating red and processed meats increases your risk of mortality by at least 33%.

MEAT-LOVERS BEWARE

To assess the link between eating meat and risk of premature death, researchers at the National Cancer Institute followed more than 500,000 people for 10 years, 70,000 of whom died over the course of the study. The size of this study is what makes it so important, since it provided an opportunity to investigate the relationship between meat consumption and age at death. At the start of the study, the participants, aged 50 to 71, completed a questionnaire that asked how often they ate specific foods and also about their portion sizes. "Red meats" included beef and pork, while "processed meats" included sausages, hot dogs and all cold cuts. Participants who ate the most red and processed meats, most often and in the largest portions, were at higher risk for death from heart disease or cancer, and for death overall than those who ate the least red and processed meats. Researchers measured and controlled for a variety of critical co-factors, including alcohol intake, smoking, physical activity, weight and total caloric intake and their impact on longevity.

This essentially means that when compared with people who eat just one ounce, people who eat five ounces of red meat daily are a third more likely to die, Barry Popkin, PhD, a professor of nutrition at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill and author of The World Is Fat, told me. He added that if you eat just a single ounce of processed meat -- or one hot dog each week -- mortality risk is similarly raised, noting these results were identical for women and men. Participants who ate the most white meat (which included fish and tuna) had a slightly lower risk -- about 10% to 15% -- of death.

In an editorial accompanying the study, published earlier this year in Archives of Internal Medicine, Dr. Popkin said: "The consensus is not that we should all become vegans or vegetarians. Rather, the need is for a major reduction in total meat intake."

THE PROBLEM WITH MEAT

Where breast cancer and colorectal cancer have both been linked to cooking method as well as saturated fat content, this study is the first to implicate red and processed meats not just in those two cancers but in total cancer deaths, as well as cardiovascular deaths and overall mortality. According to Dr. Popkin, there are several factors that make these meats a poor meal choice...

• Cancer-causing compounds form when meat is cooked at high temperatures, as when it is grilled.

• Meat is high in iron, which is thought to promote cancer when consumed in excess.

• Meat intake is likely to contribute to elevated blood pressure and cholesterol levels, increasing the risk for heart disease.

• Processed meat, even if it’s low-fat, contains cancer-causing nitrites.

CHANGING YOUR DIET

According to Dr. Popkin, reducing red meat intake to just once a week, at most, and completely eliminating processed meats would save the lives of a million men and just under a million women in the 50 to 59 age group over the next decade. "People could cut their individual risk by 30% over 10 years," he noted -- adding "that’s a pretty big saving." For long-term health benefits, Dr. Popkin suggests choosing poultry, fish and legumes, rather than red meat, as sources of protein. Also, he advises, those who have risk factors that increase their likelihood of premature death, such as hypertension, diabetes, cancer or heart disease, or who are overweight or obese, should be "especially wary." "If you’re at greater risk for disease to start with, eating red meat will increase your risk even more."

Source(s):

Barry Popkin, PhD, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina. He is author of The World Is Fat: The Fads, Trends, Policies and Products That Are Fattening the Human Race (Avery).

* * *

Editor's Note: Actually, Dr Sears, Dr Ravnskov, and myself would agree with about 99% of this article. The China Study came to the same conclusion. But like most studies, these meat studies commit the sin of omission.

Red meat is not deadly. Our food supply is deadly. Our livestock are filled with hormones, pesticides, herbicides, antibiotics, and thousands of other chemicals found in their air, feed, and water.

The information on our cooking methods and how meats are processed (cured) is right on target. This is why we've written articles in the past on how to avoid the dangers of overcooking and processing.

Choosing grass fed beef that's not been subjected to the onslaught of drugs and chemicals is a very good start. The price we pay for agribusiness is death.

Dr Al Sears is one of our good friends. He's got some great information in his newsletters, and his products are the top of the line.

Go to Original: Study

TUCSON, July 15 (UPI) -- A U.S. study suggests physicians may often miss potentially dangerous drug interactions.

Researchers led by the University of Arizona found medication prescribers correctly identified fewer than half of drug pairs with potentially dangerous interactions.

The scientists said their finding is important because statistics indicate an average of 2.3 medications is prescribed during each U.S. physician office visit.

The researchers, led by Professor Daniel Malone, mailed a questionnaire to 12,500 U.S. prescribers who were selected based on a history of prescribing drugs associated with known potential drug interactions. Prescribers were primarily physicians, physicians' assistants and nurse practitioners.

Recipients were asked to classify 14 drug pairs as "contraindicated," "may be used together, but with monitoring" or "no interaction." Respondents could also state that they were "not sure."

The 950 respondents classified 42.7 percent of all drug combinations correctly. Of the 14 drug pairs presented, four of them were contraindicated, but a majority of prescribers correctly identified only one of the four pairs as contraindicated.

Moreover, for half of the 14 drug pairs, more than one-third of the respondents answered they were "not sure," and two of these drug pairs were contraindicated.

Malone said the findings indicate health professional programs are not doing enough to teach students about potential drug interactions.

A synopsis of the research appeared in the May issue of the journal Research Activities.

Hi David

I wanted to respond to what was being addressed...ADHD..etc. When my son Ben was a baby, I knew something was wrong, he would NOT sleep...he would stand or sit in his crib for hrs rocking..later other behaviors such as compulsive picking of his skin, paint on the walls, head banging etc. By the time he was 6 years old, they had diagnosed him with ADHD/ADD/OCD/ODD! Well, I was on a mission LOL. When he was 7 they said he was Bi polar! I said yer nuts! Its the meds turning him into a monster! Well by the time he was in the third grade, the boy still could not read and I had lodged two suits against the Schools..one of them because a teacher could not handle him and I had found out she put his desk in a closet! To make a long story short..I took Ben out of school for a year, I homeschooled him, taught him to read and other things. One night...he was crying that his chest hurt. I took him to ER. He was having a heart attack..later said to have been caused by a new drug they put him on..GEODON! The heart attack was minor and caused no damage, but that was enough for me. I took him off of ALL meds. I then enrolled him in a behavior modification program and another program that taught ME how to teach him. I won my case with the schools and they in turn asked me to come speak to them. Now years later..my son no longer has this diagnosis, he is in the Navy and doing so well. When he was in High School he was sent to a Gifted school. He is proof that a child's life does not end with an ADHD diagnosis. I am currently writing two new books and one of them is about my son's journey. I just wanted to share all that with you.

Sheila

Go to Original: Aspirin

Millions of people - including a substantial number of the "worried well" - take a daily dose of the drug in the belief it will keep them healthy.

But at a conference for leading doctors, British scientists said they have found that for healthy people taking aspirin does not significantly reduce the risk of a heart attack.

At the same time they found it almost doubles the risk of being admitted to hospital due to internal bleeding.

The findings show that for otherwise healthy people the risks of taking aspirin outweigh the benefits. The doctors stressed that patients who had already suffered a heart attack should continue to take the drug.

It has been suggested that aspirin could be included in a so-called 'polypill' with an anti-cholesterol statin and a blood pressure drug which could be taken by everyone aged over 50.

Experts said substantial numbers of 'worried well' take aspirin as a 'just in case' measure believing that because it has been around for such a long time it is completely safe.

The results of a study carried out in Scotland and presented at the European Society of Cardiology Congress in Barcelona has added to the growing evidence that the risks outweigh the benefits for healthy people.

Prof Gerry Fowkes of the Wolfson Unit for Prevention of Peripheral Vascular Disease in Edinburgh, said: “Our research suggests that aspirin should not be prescribed to the general population at this stage.

“Aspirin probably leads to a minor reduction in future events but the problem is that has to be weighed against an increase in bleeding. Some of that bleeding can be quite serious and lead to death.”

Prof Peter Weissberg, Medical Director of the British Heart Foundation, which part-funded the study, said: "A lot of the worried well buy a small dose of aspirin over the counter not understanding that they are increasing their risk substantially of a major bleed."

He said it is known that aspirin does reduce the risk of cardiovascular problems but this must be countered against the increased risk of internal bleeding.

In patients who have already had a heart attack the risk of a second is so much higher that the balance is in favour of taking aspirin.

However, for people who have not had a heart attack the risks do not normally outweigh the benefits.

Prof Weissberg added: "If you have not got clear cut vascular disease that has caused an event while it does reduce the risk (of a heart attack or stroke) that benefit is offset by a worse risk of haemorrhage and potentially fatal haemorrhage."

In the study conducted in Scotland 29,000 men and women aged between 50 and 75 were screened to see if they had furred arteries in the legs, which means they are at high risk of developing heart disease but do not yet have symptoms.

More than 3,000 men were randomly assigned to receive a daily dose of aspirin or a dummy pill and were followed up for an average of eight years.

There was no difference in the rate of heart attacks or stroke between the two groups and deaths from any cause were similar.

However there were 34 major bleeds in people taking aspirin, or two per cent, compared with 20 or 1.2 per cent of those on the placebo.

He said the tablets were only taken 60 per cent of the time during the trial which reflects real life experience in people who have not had a heart attack.

He said in secondary prevention, where people have already had one attack and are trying to prevent a second one, compliance is usually better.

Earlier this year Oxford scientists found that although aspirin could cut the chances of a heart attack in patients who had never suffered one by a fifth, it also increased the risk of stomach bleeding by a third.

Nick Henderson Executive Director of the Aspirin Foundation said: "Aspirin use to prevent primary cardiovascular events is only appropriate where individual patients are considered by their doctor to be at special risk from particular factors such as obesity, lifestyle, stress and a familial history.

"The Aspirin Foundation continues to counsel individuals always to seek medical advice before embarking on a self medication prophylactic regime with Aspirin for whatever reason.

"Medical advocates of prophylactic Aspirin in the absence of previous cardiovascular events accept that potential benefits should be weighed against potential risks such as the bleeding demonstrated in the study by Professor Fowkes."

As I write this newsletter, a huge mug of water is next to me with both this Hydrogen-Rich Water Stick and a sachet of AquaLyte.

These people are not going away, but just in case they change their methods, we've hijacked their site, and posted it here.

You will see that they've been whacked by FCC rules so many times that now they have full disclosure at the site, though in a small gray font.

If you read the bottom disclosure, you'll see the whopping charges they will bill you if you don't cancel after ordering the free sample.

At the price their charging, and the amount of 100mgs of Acai in each pill, we've worked it out to cost you over $6,000.00 a pound

View the Acai Rip-Off Site

Don't fall for the Acai Berry Web Scams. Their Acai Berry sells for $6,000.00 a pound. This is the real thing, $34.95 for 45 servings.

At the latest annual meeting of the American Association for Cancer Research, two studies showed a link between levels of Vitamin D and breast cancer.

The first study, conducted at University of California at San Diego, compared blood levels of Vitamin D in nearly 2000 women. They next did a cohort study, comparing those levels in women who had developed breast cancer and those who had not. The women with the highest levels of Vitamin D had less than half the chance of getting breast cancer compared to women with lower levels.

The second study, done at Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto interviewed 1,700 women. One third of those interviewed were breast cancer patients. This time the study focused on sunlight exposure. The results of the study showed that those women with the highest sunlight exposure between the ages of 10 and 29 had a whopping 40% reduced risk of breast cancer over those who had the least exposure.

Experts believe that just 10 minutes of sun exposure (arms, legs, face) at midday is all you need, but as we pointed out already in this newsletter, we clean Americans are washing off this Vitamin D. Hence, if you’re going to wash with soap, or not get enough sunlight, this makes a case for supplementation.

Here is the form I use. I take 5,000 IU daily.

Further Reading:

A really good article on Tanning Beds is located here: Mercola

Go to Original: Repeat offender Pfizer paying record $2.3B settlement for illegal drug promotions

WASHINGTON — Federal prosecutors hit Pfizer Inc. with a record-breaking $2.3 billion in fines Wednesday and called the world’s largest drugmaker a repeating corporate cheat for illegal drug promotions that plied doctors with free golf, massages, and resort junkets.

Announcing the penalty as a warning to all drug manufacturers, Justice Department officials said the overall settlement is the largest ever paid by a drug company for alleged violations of federal drug rules, and the $1.2 billion criminal fine is the largest ever in any U.S. criminal case. The total includes $1 billion in civil penalties and a $100 million criminal forfeiture.

Authorities called Pfizer a repeat offender, noting it is the company’s fourth such settlement of government charges in the last decade. The allegations surround the marketing of 13 different drugs, including big sellers such as Viagra, Zoloft, and Lipitor.

As part of its illegal marketing, Pfizer invited doctors to consultant meetings at resort locations, paying their expenses and providing perks, prosecutors said.

“They were entertained with golf, massages, and other activities,” said Mike Loucks, the U.S. attorney in Massachusetts.

Loucks said that even as Pfizer was negotiating deals on past misconduct, they were continuing to violate the very same laws with other drugs.

To prevent backsliding this time, Pfizer’s conduct will be specially monitored by the Health and Human Service Department inspector general for five years.

In an unusual twist, the head of the Justice Department, Attorney General Eric Holder, did not participate in the record settlement, because he had represented Pfizer on these issues while in private practice.

Associate Attorney General Thomas Perrelli said the settlement illustrates ways the Justice Department “can help the American public at a time when budgets are tight and health care costs are rising.”

Perrelli announced the settlement terms at a news conference with federal prosecutors and FBI, and Health and Human Services Department officials.

The settlement ends an investigation that also resulted in guilty pleas from two former Pfizer sales managers.

Officials said the U.S. industry has paid out more than $11 billion in such settlements over the past decade, but one consumer advocate voiced hope that Wednesday’s penalty was so big it would curb the abuses.

“There’s so much money in selling pills, that there’s a tremendous temptation to cheat,” said Bill Vaughan, an analyst at Consumers Union, the nonprofit publisher of Consumer Reports.

“There’s a kind of mentality in this sector that (settlements) are the cost of doing business and we can cheat. This penalty is so huge I think consumers can have some hope that maybe these guys will tighten up and run a better ship.”

The government said the company promoted four prescription drugs, including the pain killer Bextra, as treatments for medical conditions different from those the drugs had been approved for by federal regulators. Authorities said Pfizer’s salesmen and women created phony doctor requests for medical information in order to send unsolicited information to doctors about unapproved uses and dosages.

Use of drugs for so-called “off-label” medical conditions is not uncommon, but drug manufacturers are prohibited from marketing drugs for uses that have not been approved by the Food and Drug Administration. They said the junkets and other company-paid perks were designed to promote Bextra and other drugs, to doctors for unapproved uses and dosages, backed by false and misleading claims about safety and effectiveness.

Bextra, for instance, was approved for arthritis, but Pfizer promoted it for acute pain and surgical pain, and in dosages above the approved maximum. In 2005, Bextra, one of a class of painkillers known as Cox-2 inhibitors, was pulled from the U.S. market amid mounting evidence it raised the risk of heart attack, stroke and death.

A Pfizer subsidiary, Pharmacia and Upjohn Inc., which was acquired in 2003, has entered an agreement to plead guilty to one count of felony misbranding. The criminal case applied only to Bextra.

The $1 billion in civil penalties was related to Bextra and a number of other medicines.

A portion of the civil penalty will be distributed to 49 states and the District of Columbia, according to agreements with each state’s Medicaid program.

Pfizer’s top lawyer, Amy Schulman, said the settlements “bring final closure to significant legal matters and help to enhance our focus on what we do best — discovering, developing and delivering innovative medicines.”

In her statement, Schulman said: “We regret certain actions taken in the past, but are proud of the action we’ve taken to strengthen our internal controls and pioneer new procedures.”

In financial filings in January, the company had indicated that it would pay $2.3 billion over the allegations.

The civil settlement announced Wednesday covered Pfizer’s promotions of Bextra, blockbuster nerve pain and epilepsy treatment Lyrica, schizophrenia medicine Geodon, antibiotic Zyvox and nine other medicines. The agreement with the Justice Department resolves the investigation into promotion of all those drugs, Pfizer said.

The government said Pfizer also paid kickbacks to market a host of big-name drugs: Aricept, Celebrex, Lipitor, Norvasc, Relpax, Viagra, Zithromax, Zoloft, and Zyrtec.

The allegations came to light thanks largely to five Pfizer employees and one Pennsylvania doctor, who will now share $102 million of the settlement money.

FBI Assistant Director Kevin Perkins praised the whistleblowers who decided to “speak out against a corporate giant that was blatantly violating the law and misleading the public through false marketing claims.”

To rein in the abuses, the government’s five-year monitoring will force Pfizer to notify doctors about Wednesday’s agreement, encourage them to report any similar behavior, and publicly post any payments or perks it gives to doctors.

Under terms of the settlement, Pfizer must pay $1 billion to compensate Medicaid, Medicare, and other federal health care programs. Some of that money will be shared among the states: New York, for example, will receive $66 million, according to the state’s attorney general, Andrew Cuomo.

When Pfizer originally disclosed the settlement figure, it also announced plans to acquire rival Wyeth for $68 billion. That deal, which would bolster Pfizer’s position as the world’s top drugmaker by revenue, is expected to close before year’s end.

Shares of Pfizer dropped 14 cents to $16.24 in midday trading.

AP Business Writer Linda A. Johnson in Trenton, N.J., contributed to this report.

I rarely encourage people to watch television but here’s one series I think is worth making time for... on PBS and produced by American Health Journal, it is called Discoveries in Alternative Medicine. It aims to show modern-day viewers the kind of practical and functional care that naturopathic physicians provide.

Not many people really understand what it is like to receive care from a naturopathic physician, I was told by Karen Howard, executive director of the American Association of Naturopathic Physicians in Washington, DC. She said the short documentary is meant to demystify the practice of this ancient form of medicine, helping people to understand how useful it can be. Naturopathic care is focused on maximizing the patient’s ability to stay healthy and prevent disease, rather than just controlling symptoms. The six-part, interview-based series involves more than 20 physicians and 10 patients working over a three-month period to address complaints ranging from cancer to chronic illnesses like arthritis, plus simple wellness and immune-boosting strategies. Among the episodes are...

• Naturopathic Medical Education -- shows the extensive training that naturopathic physicians receive and how it is similar to and different from that of allopathic (mainstream) doctors.

• Cancer -- how the environment causes cancer and how naturopathic doctors can help mitigate its deleterious effects.

• Chronic Disease -- the effect of chronic illnesses, such as Parkinson’s or chronic fatigue, and the unique ways that NDs treat them.

• Family Medicine -- including achieving wellness through lifestyle for all patients, childhood through old age.

• Diabetes and Cardiovascular Disease -- highlighting how the two are connected and what people can do to prevent, reverse or reduce future cardiovascular problems.

• Mental Health, Allergies and Chronic Pain -- on how to soothe symptoms naturally, while working toward wellness.

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR HEALTH

The goal of the series is to show how working with a naturopathic physician can enable you to take control of your own health care. "The body has the innate ability to heal itself," says Howard, adding that the program is actually about "patient-oriented" health care. For instance, she noted, naturopathic physicians receive virtually the same biomedical training -- both in terms of time and content -- as do MDs. The key difference, however, is that NDs emphasize prevention of disease before it happens by supporting health and improving wellness, whereas mainstream medicine is aimed at suppressing the symptoms of an existing disease. The television program tells how this works and shows how patients benefit from such an approach.

The series first aired in the greater LA area in April, on PBS. Discoveries in Alternative Medicine will be broadcast in other areas over the next several months -- check local listings for dates and times in your community. If you want to take a sneak peak at the series, go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZMZlWjspFg.

Source(s):

Karen E. Howard, executive director, American Association of Naturopathic Physicians.

Go to Original: Heart Surgeon Admits Huge Mistake!

We physicians with all our training, knowledge and authority often acquire a rather large ego that tends to make it difficult to admit we are wrong.  So, here it is.  I freely admit to being wrong.  As a heart surgeon with 25 years experience, having performed over 5,000 open-heart surgeries, today is my day to right the wrong with medical and scientific fact.

I trained for many years with other prominent physicians labeled “opinion makers.”  Bombarded with scientific literature, continually attending education seminars, we opinion makers insisted heart disease resulted from the simple fact of elevated blood cholesterol.

The only accepted therapy was prescribing medications to lower cholesterol and a diet that severely restricted fat intake.  The latter of course we insisted would lower cholesterol and heart disease.  Deviations from these recommendations were considered heresy and could quite possibly result in malpractice.

It Is Not Working!

These recommendations are no longer scientifically or morally defensible.  The discovery a few years ago that inflammation in the artery wall is the real cause of heart disease is slowly leading to a paradigm shift in how heart disease and other chronic ailments will be treated.

The long-established dietary recommendations have created epidemics of obesity and diabetes, the consequences of which dwarf any historical plague in terms of mortality, human suffering and dire economic consequences.

Despite the fact that 25% of the population takes expensive statin medications and despite the fact we have reduced the fat content of our diets, more Americans will die this year of heart disease than ever before.

Statistics from the American Heart Association show that 75 million Americans currently suffer from heart disease, 20 million have diabetes and 57 million have pre-diabetes. These disorders are affecting younger and younger people in greater numbers every year.

Simply stated, without inflammation being present in the body, there is no way that cholesterol would accumulate in the wall of the blood vessel and cause heart disease and strokes.  Without inflammation, cholesterol would move freely throughout the body as nature intended.  It is inflammation that causes cholesterol to become trapped.

Inflammation is not complicated — it is quite simply your body’s natural defense to a foreign invader such as a bacteria, toxin or virus.  The cycle of inflammation is perfect in how it protects your body from these bacterial and viral invaders.  However, if we chronically expose the body to injury by toxins or foods the human body was never designed to process, a condition occurs called chronic inflammation. Chronic inflammation is just as harmful as acute inflammation is beneficial.

What thoughtful person would willfully expose himself repeatedly to foods or other substances that are known to cause injury to the body?  Well, smokers perhaps, but at least they made that choice willfully.

The rest of us have simply followed the recommended mainstream diet that is low in fat and high in polyunsaturated fats and carbohydrates, not knowing we were causing repeated injury to our blood vessels.  This repeated injury creates chronic inflammation leading to heart disease, stroke, diabetes and obesity.  Let me repeat that. The injury and inflammation in our blood vessels is caused by the low fat diet that has been recommended for years by mainstream medicine.

What are the biggest culprits of chronic inflammation? Quite simply, they are the overload of simple, highly processed carbohydrates (sugar, flour and all the products made from them) and the excess consumption of omega-6 vegetable oils like soybean, corn and sunflower that are found in many processed foods.

[Ed. Note: Dr. Dwight Lundell is the past Chief of Staff and Chief of Surgery at Banner Heart Hospital, Mesa, AZ.  His private practice, Cardiac Care Center was in Mesa, AZ.  Recently Dr. Lundell left surgery to focus on the nutritional treatment of heart disease.  He is the founder of Healthy Humans Foundation that promotes human health with a focus on helping large corporations promote wellness. He is the author of The Cure For Heart Disease and The Great Cholesterol Lie. Click here now to learn more.]

Further Reading:

Interview with Dr Lundell: Risking Our Lives for Big Pharma Profits

Click here: Administration Seeks to Restrict Antibiotics in Livestock - NYTimes.com

Morans

WTF? Wisconsin Tourism Federation changes name after internet jokes

Good-Bye Fructose
One study show us how high fructose corn syrup compares to glucose in our body's biology (but not a word about our immune system.)

Fact: High fructose corn syrup drives up your need/desire for food. Sugars in fruit, do not, because the fructose is balanced with glucose.

“The powerful have invoked God at their side in this war, so that we will accept their power and our weakness as something that has been established by divine plan. But there is no god behind this war other than the god of money, nor any right other than the desire for death and destruction. Today there is a "NO" which shall weaken the powerful and strengthen the weak: the "NO" to war.” Subcomandante Marcos - Source: No to war, 2/16/03

“Each of the Iraqi children killed by the United States was our child. Each of the prisoners tortured in Abu Ghraib was our comrade. Each of their screams was ours. When they were humiliated, we were humiliated. The U.S. soldiers fighting in Iraq - mostly volunteers in a poverty draft from small towns and poor urban neighborhoods - are victims just as much as the Iraqis of the same horrendous process, which asks them to die for a victory that will never be theirs.” Arundhati Roy - Source: Arundhati Roy, Tide? Or Ivory Snow?  8/24/04

It's never too late...

From Steven Colbert:

But sadly, every time a racist criticizes president Obama, somebody cries, "Racism."

I wish every African American was like President Obama...raised by white people.

Contains Harsh Language.

Once Again Bill Maher Gets it Right! (Contains Harsh Language)

New Rule: Democrats must get in touch with their "inner asshole." And, no, I'm not being gratuitously crude when I say that. I refer to the case of one, Van Jones, who was the man the Obama Administration hired to find jobs for Americans in the new green industries. Hmm, seems like a smart thing to do in a recession. But, Van Jones got fired because he got caught on tape saying Republicans are assholes. And they call it news.

Now, I know that right now I'm supposed to be all re-injected with "Yes We Can" fever after the big healthcare speech. And it was a great speech. You know, when Black Elvis gets jiggy with his Teleprompter there's nobody better.

But, here's the thing. Muhammad Ali also had a way with words. But, it helped enormously that he could also punch guys in the face.

It bothers me that Obama didn't say a word in defense of Mr. Van Jones, and basically fired him when Glenn Beck told him to. Just like we dropped "end of life counseling" from healthcare because Sarah Palin said it meant "death panels" on her Facebook page. Crazy morons make up things for Obama to do, and he does it.

Same thing with the speech to schools this week, where the president attempted to merely tell children to work hard and wash their hands. And "Cracker Nation" reacted as if he was trying to hire the Black Panthers to hand out grenades in home room.

And, of course, the White House immediately capitulated. "No students will be forced to view the speech," a White House spokesperson assured a panicked nation. Well, isn't that like admitting that the president might be doing something unseemly? What a bunch of cowards.

If the White House had any balls, they'd have said, "He's giving a speech on the importance of staying in school, and if you jackasses don't show it to every damn kid, we're cutting off your federal education funding tomorrow."

The Democrats just never learn. Americans don't really care which side of an issue you're on as long as you don't act like pussies.

When Van Jones called the Republicans "assholes," he was actually paying them a compliment. He was. He was talking about how they can get things done even when they're the minority. As opposed to the Democrats, who can't seem to get anything done even when they control both houses of Congress, the presidency and Bruce Springsteen.

You know, I love Obama's civility, his desire to work with his enemies. It's positively Christ-like. In college, he was probably the guy at the dorm parties who made sure the stoners shared their pot with the jocks.

But, we don't need that guy now. We need an asshole. Mr. President, there are some people who are never going to like you. That's why they voted for the old guy and "Carrie's mom."

You're not going to win them over. Stand up for the 70% of Americans who aren't crazy.

And, speaking of that 70%, when are we going to actually show up in all this? You know, tomorrow, Glenn Beck's army of zombie retirees are descending on Washington. It's the "Million Moron March." Although they won't get a million, of course, because many will be confused and drive to Washington State.

But, they will make news, because people who take to the streets always do. They're at town hall meetings screaming at the congressmen. We're on the couch screaming at the TV. You know, especially in this age of Twitters and blogs and Snuggies it's a statement just to leave the house. But, leave the house, we must, because this is our last best shot for a long time to get the sort of serious healthcare reform that would make the United States the envy of several African nations.

And Again!

New Rule: If American can't get off its back and get something done, it must lose the bald eagle as our symbol and replace it with the YouTube video of the puppy that can't get up. [YouTube video of puppy that can't get up shown] It's delightful. As long as we're pathetic, we might as well act like it's cute.

And I'm sorry, but, you know what? We are pathetic, inert and lethargic, unable to end bad things like wars, farm subsidies, our oil addiction; 60,000 troops are still in Germany; the drug war, useless weapons programs. And unable to initiate anything good.

And even when we do address a problem, the plan is always half-assed. It can never start until years later. Like the climate change bill in Congress now. It mandates a whopping 17% cut in the greenhouse gases that are killing us, by 2020. Who's in charge of this program? FEMA?

No, really, fellows, don't rush. Only the whole western half of the United States has been on fire for a month. I know, let's get to Mexicans using the hospital first.

We might pass new mileage standards, but even if we do, they wouldn't start until 2016. In that year, our cars of the future will glide along while achieving a breathtaking 35 miles per gallon. My goodness, is that even humanly possible? You socialist dreamer you!

"What do we want?!" "A small improvement!" "When do we want it?!" "2016!"

Come on! You know, when it's something for us personally, like a laxative, it has to start working NOW! My TV remote has a button on it now called "On Demand." "You get your ass on my TV screen right now SpongeBob and make me laugh! NOW!"

But, with the big important things, we're that puppy. The president has said about healthcare, "If we were starting from scratch, then a single-payer system would probably make sense."

So let's start from scratch.

Instead we have a crappy, lobbyist-written "bl*wjob to corporate America" bill, and even if that passes, it doesn't kick in until 2013! During which time, close to 200,000 people will die because they're not covered and 3,000,000 will go bankrupt from hospital bills.

You know, I have a pretty good idea of the Republican plan for the next three years: don't let Obama do anything. What kills me is, apparently that's the Democrats' plan, too.

You know, we weren't always like this. In 1965, Johnson signed Medicare into law. Eleven months later, seniors were receiving benefits. In World War II, FDR converted car companies to making tanks and planes virtually overnight. In one eight-year period, America went from JFK's ridiculous dream of landing a man on the moon...to landing a man on the moon.

This generation has had eight years just to build something at Ground Zero: an office building, a museum, a Pinkberry, I don't care anymore!

America: Home of the Freedom Pit. Which, ironically, is spitting distance from Wall Street, where they knock down buildings a different way: through foreclosure. And that's the ultimate sign of our lethargy. Millions thrown out of their homes, tossed out of work, lost their life savings, and they just take it.

Thirty percent interest on credit cards? Are you kidding me? It's a good thing for the banks the Supreme Court legalized sodomy.

You know, I still like the president. I can't help but like the president. He's my favorite TV character. And I root for him like I root for Jon Cryer to get laid.

But, what happened to change? And when did the fierce urgency of "Now" become, "Your call is important to us, please continue to hold"?

Bill Maher's New Rules can be found at: HBO

I sent the following article to some British friends and to an Australian.

Millionaire faces jail for attacking intruder
A millionaire in the UK faces life in prison for attacking a robber who held him and his family at knife point, a story by the Telegraph.co.uk said.

Munir Hussain, 52, was found guilty of "inflicting grievous bodily harm with intent," for attacking Walid Salem, 56, one of three raiders who broke into his house and forced him, his wife and three children to lie on the floor with their hands behind their backs. At some point they were able to overtake Salem, and neighbors say they saw "several men" beating him with weapons including a cricket bat and a metal pole.

Salem was left with injuries including a fractured skull and bruising on the brain. In another twist, Salem could be eligible for criminal injury compensation, even though he recovered to commit other crimes.

Here is what I got back from one:

Your preaching to the converted here David.. :( I too have been victimized and had my car stolen recently as well by aboriginals and i chased them down my drive and I have been told since that they would have beaten me up any way... one was killed and the other lost his leg being thrown from my much loved and cared for car I owned for 20 years and now the one who lost is leg is going to sue police for chasing him down at 170 kph! I was left in shock and already fragile from being stalked for 6 years and still am and being hassled every day and when I complain i get into trouble?

The Law is an ASS as Charles Dickens once said and has not changed from the old British laws and its pathetic.. I have gone to legal people and been through horrid court cases and the perpetrators get the evil barristers etc and lie and lie and the innocent end up in a mess... I went to local members and i have written to media.. you have no idea how hard I have tried and to help others..

I have the cruelest neighbors who poisoned my old dog and broke my new dogs teeth and slashed my tired and had me followed and hang up calls and disturb my dog all the time and then blame him for getting upset!

They have thrown things in my garden and cut branches of my palms and cigarette butts, they are the only ones in the street like it and people know it and now they have put a sign with Jesus is the life in their window? so this is what we are up against and the police are corrupt in this town and many other places.

I live alone and I tried to stop having my car stolen and no one helped me other than neighbor across the road who called the police and i do not harm to anyone but the neighbors next door will not stop and now I am forced to sell my lovely home and beautiful garden.. evil people!

My health has suffered and i am exhausted and there is so much more but I hope this shows you more about laws here and how the good people get no help.

CEO Compensation: Who Said Health Care is in a Financial Crisis?

Jon Stewart: Still the Most Trusted Newscaster in America

 Idiot of the Year

The human animal is the only communal animal that must be forced to contribute to that community. But...

Animals can tell right from wrong

Regina Brett's 45 life lessons and 5 to grow on
by Regina Brett
Sunday May 28, 2006, 10:13 AM

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.

It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

To reach this Plain Dealer columnist:

rbrett@plaind.com , 216-999-6328

McCain Reacts To KSM Being Waterboarded 183 Times: ‘One Is Too Much. Waterboarding Is Torture’

"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain

Mark Twain explains the thought process of the current opposition party:

Mark Twain once was asked if he would engage in a debate. He said: Oh, sure, as long as I can take the negative side.

We haven't even told you the subject of the debate.

He said: It doesn't matter, the negative side is going to require no preparation.
 

Would you fall for this?

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From the late George Carlin:

Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.

RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM PEOPLE OUR AGE

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

 I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles.

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they  drive behind obeys the speed limit.

Jewish Buddhism

If there is no self, whose flu is this? 

Be here now.  Be someplace else later.  Is that so complicated? 

Drink tea and nourish life; with the first sip, joy; with the second sip, satisfaction; with the third sip, peace; with the fourth, a muffin. 

Wherever you go, there you are.  Your luggage is another story. 

Accept misfortune as a blessing.  Do not wish for perfect health, or a life without problems.  What would you talk about? 

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single Oy. 

There is no escaping karma.  In a previous life, you never called, you never wrote, you never visited.  And whose fault was that? 

Zen is not easy.  It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have?  Bupkis. 

The Tao does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides. The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others. The Tao is not Jewish.  

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Forget this and attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems. 

Let your mind be as a floating cloud.  Let your stillness be as a wooded glen.  And sit up straight. You'll never meet the Buddha with such rounded shoulders. 

Deep inside you are ten thousand flowers. Each flower blossoms ten thousand times. Each blossom has ten thousand petals. You might want to see a specialist. 

Be aware of your body. Be aware of your perceptions; Keep in mind that not every physical sensation is a symptom of a terminal illness. 

The Torah says, Love your neighbor as yourself. The Buddha says “There is no self.”  So, maybe we're off the hook.

The day after the gala opening, the gallery owner called the artist and said, "I've got good news and bad news.

 "The good news is, a man inquired whether your paintings would appreciate in value after you're dead and gone.  I told him yes, and he bought all 12 on the spot!"

 "What's the bad news?" asked the artist.  

"The buyer is CEO of your health insurance company."

I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart.

The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better.   I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me.

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

A homeless man, down on his luck, went into a Catholic church that was known for its rather “uppity” social reputation. Spotting the man’s dirty clothes, the ushers stopped him outside the church door and asked if he needed help. The man told them, “I was praying and the Lord told me to come to this church.”

The ushers suggested that the man go away and pray some more and me might get a different answer.

The following Sunday the man returned and the ushers again stopped him at the door. “Well, did you get a different answer?” they asked him.

“Yes, I did,” said the man. “I told the Lord that you don’t want me here, but the Lord said, ‘Keep trying, son. I’ve been trying to get into that church for years and I haven’t made it yet either.”

Misdiagnosis

Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart.

One of the students said to his friend: 'I'm sure he has Petry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that.'

The other student says: 'No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks just as we learned in class.'

Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man.

They approached him and one of the students said to him: 'We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is?'

The old man said: 'I'll tell you, but first you'll tell me what you think.'

One of the students said: 'I think it's Petry Syndrome.'

The old man said: 'You thought......... But you are wrong.'

Then the other student said: 'I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome.' The old man said: 'You thought........ But you are wrong.

So they asked him: 'Well, what do you have?'

The old man said: 'I thought it was GAS ..... But I was wrong.'

Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary

8:00 am - Dog food!  My favorite thing!

9:30 am - A car ride!  My favorite thing!

9:40 am - A walk in the park!  My favorite thing!

10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted!  My favorite thing!

12:00 pm - Lunch!  My favorite thing!

1:00 pm - Played in the yard!  My favorite thing!

3:00 pm - Wagged my tail!  My favorite thing!

5:00 pm - Milk bones!  My favorite thing!

7:00 pm - Got to play ball!  My favorite thing!

8:00 pm - Wow!  Watched TV with the people!  My favorite thing!

11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed!  My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary

Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.  They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.  Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.  In any attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.  I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.  However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.  Bastards.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight.  I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.  However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.  I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies."  I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking.  I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges.  He is regularly released –and seems to be more than willing to return.  He is obviously retarded.  The bird has got to be an informant.  I observe him communicate with the guards regularly.  I am certain that he reports my every move.  My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.

For now.......

A photographer for CNN was assigned to cover southern California 's Wildfires last year. He wanted pictures of the heroic work the Firefighters were doing as they battled the blazes.

When the photographer arrived on the scene, he realized that the smoke was so thick it would seriously impede, or even make impossible, his getting good photographs from the ground level. He requested permission from his boss to rent a plane and take photos from the air.

His request was approved and he used his cell phone to call the local County airport to charter a flight. He was told a single engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.

Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger.

He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, "Let's go!"

The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and roared down the runway. Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, "Fly over the valley and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures of the fires on the hillsides."

"Why?" asked the pilot.

"Because I'm a photographer for CNN," he responded. "And I need to get some close-up shots."

The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered, "So, what you're telling me, is...you're NOT my flight instructor?"